Q: Mr. Federal Way, who do you endorse for Federal Way’s local political races and why?

A: As Mr. Federal Way has said before, the best way to know a candidate is to find out what his or her favorite reality TV show is, what flavor of ice cream he or she would be and, let’s face it, what he or she thinks about Mr. Federal Way.

So this columnist sent out a questionable questionairre to all of the local candidates for 18 opens seats, including all candidates who are running unopposed. This week, Mr. Federal Way will present the answers from the City Council and Lakehaven candidates who returned their questionairres. Here are Mr. Federal Way’s endorsements:

For City Council Position 1, Mr. Federal Way endorses Lydia Assefa-Dawson. While Mr. Federal Way is saddened that she couldn’t find anything admirable about this columnist and she likes pistachio ice cream, Mr. Federal Way appreciates the headline of her life (see answers below). Her opponent Mark Greene didn’t bother to respond to Mr. Federal Way’s questions so Mr. Federal Way won’t bother to vote for him.

Susan Honda is running solo for the Position 3 seat on the council. Mr. Federal Way thinks she is well-deserving of his endorsement because she had the most unique response for the flavor of ice cream she’d be and Mrs. Federal Way also loves to watch “Real Housewive’s of Beverly Hills.”

City Council Position 5 was tough for Mr. Federal Way to choose, but ultimately the Federal Way’s will vote for Julie Hiller, who so candidly admitted what she thinks of drivers when she’s alone in her car. Her opponent Mark Koppang was kind enough to name a local business in his choice of ice cream flavor, but Mr. Federal Way is not big on healthy food.

For Position 7 on the council, Mr. Federal Way recommends voting for Dini Duclos, who has the most unique way of unwinding after work. Her opponent PK Thumbi did not respond to these questions, therefore Mr. Federal Way will not bother to respond to his name on the ballot.

Finally, for Lakehaven Position 3, Mr. Federal Way endorses Peter Sanchez, who has the most keen eye for detail as he pointed out that a cow is not a “he.” Richard Peterson, his opponent, also did not respond to the questions, so he’s out.

Mr. Federal Way will now kick back his feet and let someone else answer some questions this week. Here are the candidate’s responses and Mr. Federal Way hopes you will find an ice cream flavor, a tap-dancing cow or a time machine answer that will sway your voting decision:

What would Mr. Federal Way find in your refrigerator right now?

Hiller: Milk, eggs, butter, cheese, veggies — pretty much stuff to throw together sandwiches, salads and easy breakfasts. Also beverages, condiments and a science experiment or two.

Koppang: Healthy food!

Assefa-Dawson: Milk, water, fruit, bread, butter, Ethiopian food.

Duclos: My food, dog food, chocolate ice cream, my Sunday shoes, etc.

Honda: Fruit, milk, cheese, orange juice, pumpkin pie. Also eggs. Also whipped cream.

Sanchez: Just what you’d find in any refrigerator, absolutely nothing to shock or amaze.

What is your favorite reality TV show?

Hiller: Love lots of the HGTV shows, especially “Fixer Upper,” “Property Brothers” and “Flip or Flop.”

Koppang: “The Voice”

Assefa-Dawson: “America’s Got Talent”

Duclos: “American Pickers”

Honda: “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.” I love watching how people act.

Sanchez: “Deadliest Catch”

How do you unwind after a long day at work?

Hiller: Read, spend time with my family.

Koppang: Catch up on the day with my wife and read.

Assefa-Dawson: Read short stories.

Duclos: Counter clockwise but it confuses the dog.

Honda: I like to walk my dogs or ride my exercise bike.

Sanchez: Watch the news, read, work on hobbies.

What did you eat for dinner last night?

Hiller: Tylenol Cold, followed by ice cream.

Koppang: Stir fry.

Assefa-Dawson: I didn’t. I ate a late lunch at Black Bear Diner.

Duclos: Looking at the crumbs on the counter either pizza or biscuits or toast or maybe a dog biscuit.

Honda: I had a root beer float for dinner last night. It was really good!

Sanchez: Chicken pot pie.

Where would you go in a time machine?

Hiller: Back to 2001, the year our daughter was born. I’d especially want to spend time with her and my parents (who are now deceased) together. She was their only grandchild and watching them interact was magical. I would love to have another chance for us to all be together. Since I would be time-traveling and apparently would have superpowers, I would make sure we experienced 2001 in a lovely, tropical locale.

Koppang: Sept. 10, 2001.

Assefa-Dawson: 1994, to be present to experience President Mandela’s inaugural speech of hope.

Duclos: I would go to 2067 to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Performing Arts and Events Center.

Honda: I would like to go back to high school. Now that we have grown up it would be fun to see how and what we did back then.

Sanchez: Back to the late ‘40s, early ‘50s to stand track-side to see, hear and feel steam locomotives at work.

What would you do if you won the lottery?

Hiller: Well, first I would have to play the lottery.

Koppang: Invest it and keep working and serving the city of Federal Way.

Assefa-Dawson: Pay my debt off, make sure my kids are taken car of, buy a condo/house, give to my church and to charities

Duclos: Pay for the Performing Arts and Events Center, of course.

Honda: Give most of the money to a deserving charity. I could not tell you which one but children would be involved. I would have a family vacation for all of my family, sisters and their families, and my children and grandchildren. I don’t need anything. Helping others would be what everyone will say. I mean it.

Sanchez: Pay off everything that I owe and make sure my grandson will get a good education. Other than that, I have no clue.

If you were an ice cream, what flavor would you be?

Hiller: Tillamook Oregon hazelnut and salted caramel.

Koppang: Sub Zero coffee with pecans.

Assefa-Dawson: Pistachio.

Duclos: Chocolate — no questions about it.

Honda: If I were ice cream I would be vanilla. It goes with everything and can be plain or dressed up.

Sanchez: Cookie dough.

If you were shipwrecked on a deserted island, but all your human needs — such as food and water — were taken care of, what two items would you bring with you?

Hiller: 1) An iPad with perfect Wi-Fi access available, loaded with all the apps I would ever need, and of course a complete library of e-books. 2) Some kind of all-encompassing personal care device (think Swiss Army knife, only for grooming). It would include toothbrush, hair brush, maybe a solar-powered hair dryer, nail file, tweezers, etc.

Koppang: A fully charged satellite phone and GPS locator beacon. I would enjoy a brief island vacation but would want to get home.

Assefa-Dawson: My Bible/an inspirational book and pen.

Duclos: My little dog Dwight and a copy of the Federal Way Mirror (without the ad pages).

Honda: My phone (as long as I had service) and my family, which includes my dogs.

Sanchez: My wife (even though she’s not a thing), music.

If you had only six months left to live, what would you do with the time?

Hiller: Spend time with my closest loved ones — traveling to new places would be great if health allowed. Most of all I would want to make sure to make the most of every moment with my daughter.

Koppang: That’s easy, spend time with my family and friends.

Assefa-Dawson: Visit friends far and near, continue to volunteer.

Duclos: I would walk the beach with Dwight and scuba dive in all the places I have not gone but always wanted to.

Honda: I have thought of this. I have a friend who may be facing this issue. I would spend every possible minute with my grandchildren. Of course, their parents and my husband would be around.

Sanchez: Drag my wife and grandson on a road trip to visit all the railroad museums and tourist railroads that I could.

In the news story of your life, what would the headline say?

Hiller: “Julie Hiller is a very blessed woman”

Koppang: “Mark Koppang is committed to Federal Way and its future”

Assefa-Dawson: “Triumph through tragedy”

Duclos: “Governor Duclos moved legislation through to fully fund Federal Way’s special project before her untimely demise”

Honda: I had to do this in 10th grade English. Mrs. Harvey made us write our obituaries. Let me tell you some of our parents were very upset at this assignment. I wish I could find that paper. My headline now would be that I loved to serve others. I hope that I am remembered that way.

Sanchez: “Average Joe weds, said to be luckiest man alive”

What do you think about while you’re alone in your car?

Hiller: Not very nice thoughts, when I am sitting on Interstate 5 not moving.

Koppang: What great roads we have in Federal Way!

Assefa-Dawson: I assess my day to see what I have contributed.

Duclos: Where is the next red light camera?

Honda: Where I am going and do where I need to be?

Sanchez: Not much other than where I’m going.

A cow walks through that door right now wearing tap shoes. What does he say and why is he here?

Hiller: “Hi – I’m seeking asylum.” He picked our front door because my husband is a vegetarian.

Koppang: He comments on how easy my yard signs are to read and thanks me for eating ground turkey!

Assefa-Dawson: Really? He’ll say, take these tap shoes off. I have no use for these.

Duclos: Got milk? Looking for milk.

Honda: I would tell the cow we don’t wear shoes in the house. He would leave.

Sanchez: Well if it were a cow it would be she …

What movie, no matter how many times you’ve seen it, do you have to watch when it’s on?

Hiller: “Sound of Music.” It’s a classic.

Koppang: “Gladiator” or “Ground Hog Day”

Assefa-Dawson: “Documentaries”

Duclos: “JAWS”

Honda: I don’t watch movies. They take up a lot of time.

Sanchez: “MASH”

What do you admire most about Mr. Federal Way?

Hiller: His humility, of course. (See his signature line).

Koppang: His humility.

Assefa-Dawson: Admire?

Duclos: Let me think, still thinking, still thinking. Can we get back to that later on?

Honda: I admire that even with constant criticism, you still come back every week.

Sanchez: Never really thought about it.

Boxers or briefs?

Hiller: None of your business! (C’mon…what did you think I would say?!)

Koppang: None of your business!

Assefa-Dawson: Neither.

Duclos: None of your business.

Honda: None of your business!

Sanchez: None of your business.

Q: Mr. Federal Way, how can the Mirror editor allow a notice to be placed on page 12, next to Mr. Federal Way, telling everyone daylight saving was this month and to set our clocks back? Did Mr. Federal Way set his clock back?

A: Oct. 4 was supposedly national vodka day, perhaps the staff got an early head start or they needed the extra hour for their soon-to-come hangovers. They did not invite Mr. Federal Way for some reason.

It’s also possible that it could have been the lingering effect of some past head trauma. Mr. Federal Way is unsure, but these seem to be the only plausible reasons. It’s obvious the staff wanted everyone to notice as they put it next to the main attraction of the paper.

Mr. Federal Way is humbled by the gesture. As for the clocks, Mrs. Federal Way does not let Mr. Federal Way touch them after the snooze button was mysteriously taped down one week. Mr. Federal Way claims no responsibility for that incident.

Q: Mr. Federal Way, what’s in your refrigerator?

A: None of your business.

Got a question for Mr. Federal Way? Email mrfederalway@federalwaymirror.com