Restroom Rant | Sex in the Suburbs

Published 1:00 pm Monday, April 18, 2016

North Carolina recently enacted legislation that requires people to use public restrooms consistent with the gender on their birth certificates, and our state is considering similar bills. This both perplexes and disturbs me.

How will the state enforce the law?

Do you know of any police departments that are so well-staffed that they would have the ability to deploy people to card folks on their way into bathrooms? More likely, this poorly written and too-quickly enacted legislation will prompt a form of vigilantism. Well-meaning folks, fearful and ignorant of the actual issues transgender people (who are just trying to pee in peace) face on a daily basis, may decide it necessary to take this law into their own hands and restrict people from using the restroom.

I don’t see that going anywhere good.

What about people who have transitioned to the point where they “pass” in their daily lives? People whose birth certificate may say “male” and whose bodies look female to any passerby? Or those whose birth certificate says “female” and who look like just another guy? What will happen to them in North Carolina if they use the bathroom associated with their birth certificate gender?

Is it any wonder many trans people avoid using public restrooms – and even restrict their fluid intake – so they don’t have to use the restroom in public?

If you think this issue is getting traction only in faraway states, you are wrong. Our very own 30th District legislators considered six bills in the last session with various restrictions on the gender of those allowed to use bathrooms.

At Interfaith Advocacy Days in Olympia earlier this year, I questioned Sen. Mark Miloscia (R-District 30) about a bill that would require folks’ DNA to match their bathroom use (HB 2782 and SB 6548). His response? “No, not DNA. Just biology.” I believe I was supposed to be comforted by the fact that checking DNA wasn’t on his agenda — but checking biology is?

Others have concerns about the cost to small business owners to provide bathroom access for trans folks.

Our state should take a good look at North Carolina’s business climate. More than 100 companies, including Starbucks, Apple and Google, have urged the governor to reconsider. PayPal pulled out of their investment in a global operations center in Charlotte. Bruce Springsteen canceled a concert in the state, and North Carolina’s own Attorney General has said he won’t defend the law. More than one governor, ours included, has banned using tax dollars to pay for non-essential travel to North Carolina.

There is more than one side to the “cost to businesses” issue.

More than these practical questions, though, is the underlying prejudice, fear and legislated segregation. That should bother all of us as much as it would bother us if we re-enacted Jim Crow laws that legislated the segregation of bathrooms, water fountains, schools and so much more not all that long ago.

Keep in mind that, while there is plenty of fear that laws allowing trans people to use the bathroom where they feel most comfortable will result in increased sexual assault, there is no evidence that this has ever been the case in states or school districts that allow people to choose their own restroom.

Harassment is a behavior and a choice that is not OK, no matter what your gender identity, sexual orientation, ethnicity, sex, socio-economic status or religion.

Abusing children is also a behavior and a choice that is not OK, no matter who you are.

Going to the bathroom, however, is not a choice. It is something that every human being needs to do, and everybody should be able to go in peace.

Amy Johnson, MSW, is a Trainer and Educator in the Pacific Northwest. She is co-author of the books, “Parenting by Strengths: A Parent’s Guide for Challenging Situations” and “Homegrown Faith and Justice.” Amy facilitates classes and workshops in the Puget Sound area and online. She specializes in working with parents and in sexuality education, and she serves in the national setting of the United Church of Christ promoting safe and healthy sexuality education and culture in faith communities. Amy can be reached at comments@diligentjoy.com.