The Seattle Seahawks’ historic victory in front of 75,000 fans going bonkers at Qwest Field a week ago was epic in many ways. The Seahawks became the biggest home underdog to ever win a playoff game in NFL history and the reaction after Marshawn Lynch’s 67-yard, fourth-quarter touchdown run actually caused the earth to shake in Seattle.

The Seahawks’ fans were great last Saturday during the victory over New Orleans. A vast majority cheered on their home team until their lungs hurt. They were a huge reason the Seahawks were able to pull the upset.

The 12th Man makes me proud to be a Seattle fan.

But… as with any event that draws that many people into one place, there are going to be people that annoy the living daylights out of me. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. The word fan is actually short for fanatic, and there are definitely some exceedingly fanatic fans out there.

Annoying fans are everywhere and take many different forms. But there is one thing that they all have in common — they have no idea that other fans are laughing at them behind their backs.

So, here is my list of the most annoying football fans on any given Sunday. If you or a loved one fit into any of these categories, get some help and I’m sorry.

Go Seahawks.

• The Face Painter — “Hey everybody, I’m going to the game as the ‘W’ in S-E-A-H-A-W-K-S.”

This is the 40-year-old who has given up on life. He hates his job during the week, and his wife and his kids would rather watch the Rose Bowl Parade than the actual Rose Bowl game.

Sunday afternoons at Qwest Field are this guy’s only escape from reality. So he paints an actual Seattle Seahawks’ helmet, including a facemask, on his bald head, puts on football game pants and a personalized No. 69 jersey with “Bulldozer” on the back.

• The Know-It-All — “Hey everybody around me, a defensive back can’t touch a receiver after five yards.”

This is the guy that explains to everyone within earshot what is going on down on the field. And I mean everything. This dude talks like he used to be the scouting director at the NFL Combine or something.

“Hey everybody around me, Matt Hasselbeck dropped his elbow on that throw. That’s why it sailed over the receiver.”

And, inevitably, somebody’s wife will boost the Know-It-All’s ego even more than it already is, by asking him what’s wrong with the Seahawks’ offense.

Thanks lady. Now I have to listen to a 10-minute diatribe on route running, pass protection and how horrible the play-calling is.

• The Babysitter — “Here’s a idea, sweetie. Let’s take little Suzie to the Seahawks game.”

What’s the point? If you can’t find a babysitter, then stay home. Your 15-month-old has no idea what is happening on the field and you are just annoying everybody around you.

“Oh, she looks so cute in her Seahawks onesie and her blue and green socks.” That’s all fine and dandy. But she would look a lot cuter in that outfit at home in front of the TV and not sucking on a binky and crying directly in front of me when I’m trying to watch the game.

I have kids of my own and would do anything for any one of them, except bring them to a football game when they require a “baba.”

• The Sign Guy — “I spent four hours yesterday painting this portrait of Matt Hasselbeck.”

Why would anybody over 12 years old bring a sign to a professional sporting event? Answer: No clue. The best (or worst) is the guy that packs in a huge painted “D” in one hand and a replica picket fence in the other and spends the entire game yelling “De-Fense, De-Fense, D-Fense.”

• The Announcer — “He…could…go…all…the…wayyyyy.”

This is the guy who thinks he should be sitting alongside Chris Berman on the ESPN pregame broadcasts doing highlights. I really don’t need to hear you do play-by-play of the game, while adding in an occasional “Boo-Yah” or “Fumble-ia,” I can follow the action just fine from where I’m sitting, Howard Cosell.

• The High-Fiver — “Get it up, bro.”

I have no problem with handing out a few hand slaps to strangers sitting around me at a football game, but this fan takes it to another level. This dude is so intent on giving high-fives and blowing up fist bumps, that he throws his hand up after every 3-yard run. And proper protocol prohibits you from leaving him hanging, so you just have to resign to the fact that you will need to ice your hand after the game because of excessive slapping.

• The Mover and Shaker — “I can have it to you by tomorrow.”

This is the salesman who is using his expense account at work to buy tickets to the football game so he can buy his clients a couple beers to loosen them up to spend money.

• The Hometown Hater — “I grew up a Cowboys fan.”

I don’t think anything bugs me more than this fan, and this is kind of personal. I have a buddy, who was born and raised in Auburn and not Dallas, who would root for the Cowboys even if they were playing the Seahawks in the NFC Championship.

I’m still wondering why he’s still my buddy? I guess because it’s fun to make fun of him when the Cowboys inevitably choke.

Let’s go Hawks.